I’ve been feeling them. Hard. No. More like haaaaaaaaarrrrrrrd. I have been struggling to get back into regular life, back into working, back into chores, all of it. I have had some times when I really wondered, am I okay? I felt out of sorts, unable to meet my minimal expectations of self-care. And I’m talking bare minimum – eating, sleeping, moving. I was unable to do any of it to my satisfaction. I’ve been going through my work routine and feeling exhausted by the monotony, challenged by the menial tasks. I wondered how I was going to get back into my routine and what happened to my job satisfaction and the rewarding feeling I get from doing my everyday tasks. I would try to focus my feelings, to breathe through my frustrations and find the bright side of the circumstance. I’d say a little prayer that the things coming at me would get easier to deal with.
Turns out that was the opposite of what I needed.
Because right at what should have been the end of my day today, something really challenging was thrown at me and I, in turn, threw myself into it.
And guess what happened. I got my groove back.
This evening, in the glow of being once again engaged, invigorated and excited about my work, everything was different. I felt better adjusted overall, doing the right thing for my mind and my body made sense and I really started to feel like myself again.
What a relief.